Let's be honest; this year has been one of the most challenging in my life thus far. Where has the time gone? How have 365 days gone by since I walked across the stage in the Carter? I don't know how time works at this point. I know now that growth is a natural and sometimes scary endeavor that brings the best out of a person.
On graduation day, I woke up in my childhood bedroom, ready to go back to my favorite place for the last time as a student. My dad and I got in the car and headed forty-five minutes west. The anxious nerves poured through my body rapidly. I was not ready to graduate from my favorite place on the planet. I remember the shaky hands and racing heart feelings right before Boschini called my name; I was terrified. Step on that stage, and my life changed forever. There it was, my name, that one step. And that was it. I was officially a TCU Alumna.
When I graduated, I didn't have a plan (which I learned is absolutely okay); I didn't know what friends of mine were coming to Dallas, staying in Fort Worth, or moving out of state; I felt lost. There's a reason the saying goes, "comparison is the thief of joy" I started by comparing my journey to everyone else's, feeling terrible about everything I wasn't doing. I wasn't going to grad school, I didn't have a job right away, and I wasn't getting married. I felt lost. The emotions of the weekend and beyond were taking over; I didn't know what to do. Eventually, after a few months at home for the first time since high school, I started to see a dietitian, lift weights regularly again, and work towards a professional certificate; finally, I began to see pieces falling into place.
This year has been the biggest learning experience: Living, adulting, and learning. I followed my gut and started to heal my mind and body. I taught myself that it's okay to ask for help and mentorship. It's okay not to be okay. Over the past year, there have been a lot of tears and a lot of laughs. I've traveled more than I ever have in my life, started an internship with some of the best people, networked for my future, and figured out my dreams. 365 days later, I had this epiphany. The limit does not exist (yes, I just made a Mean Girls reference, don't come for me). I really can do whatever I want in life. I finally feel like the weight is off my shoulders. I'm free.
As I reflect on this past year, I am grateful for all of it. I have found more of myself, and I cannot wait to see what happens next. These past two weeks leading up to graduation weekend for the class of 2022 have been very sentimental, and hard to believe it's been one year since I graduated. Saturday, I sat in my room and watched my friends graduate with various degrees. I cried; I was so proud. But I would be lying if some of those tears were not because I haven't been a student at my favorite place in one year. It was liberating yet sad. However, I wouldn't change anything from the past year: the ups, the downs, the good, the not so good. It was all worth it to find the light of possibility at the end of the tunnel.
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